I have thirteen minutes until I finish work for the day. This is extremely exciting, even more so than usual, because as soon as work finishes I’m going straight online to browse the biggest catalogue for plants and shrubs in Australia. A new type of flower seeds just dropped online and they will sell out very quickly so I need to purchase them as soon as I possibly can. I am really into my gardening and so is my husband, which means this type of thing is what makes our world go round. My husband and I aren’t really into watching TV or going out socialising, all we want to do is

Ten minutes! I am tapping my foot so fast on the ground. I’ve already been to the bathroom and packed my stuff. Now I’m just sitting at my computer pretending to look busy. To my coworkers, it looks like I’m writing an important last minute email with how frantically I’m typing, but in reality, I’m typing out this blog. Writing in my blog was the only thing I could think of that would successfully keep me glued to my chair and I needed to let out all of this nervous energy somehow. 

I wonder what type of flower seeds they’re about to drop. I would love to add a floribunda rose to our garden of roses. There are so many to choose from and their colours are so beautiful. My personal favourite is the rose daybreaker which starts off a light yellow in the middle and slowly gains more colour until it is a beautiful pink on the edge of the petals. I know the perfect spot for the rose daybreaker variety to go. But alas, we shall wait and see!

Okay, with six minutes left of the day, I think it is finally time to turn off my computer and dash out the door. If I leave quick enough then hopefully no one will notice.

The scent of my garden is wafting through the open window in my living room. The scent is dancing around the space, making the inside of my home smell even sweeter. I have a glorious house and a glorious garden, the two combining to create an element of luxury seldom seen in the suburb that I live in. 

I’m very glad that I directed my gardener to buy flower seeds online last summer. It was the perfect time to purchase seeds as it has allowed my garden to grow and blossom throughout the year. It smells so sweet, looks so bright and is a truly delightful sight to behold. I am looking forward to the next growing season when my gardener can plant plants that were out of season during summer. My garden can be continually added to throughout the year due to how large and expansive it is. I love my garden.

For the next growing season, I am considering advising my gardener to purchase some of those standard roses for sale at the local market. They are gorgeous and will blossom into a truly beautiful addition to my garden. I am excited to hear what my gardener has to say about my idea. Obviously, I pay him and make the final decision but I do appreciate his expertise and will be guided by what he thinks is the best gardening decision. I’m sure he will trust me to make good decisions also, seeing as he knows just how much I love my garden. 

As the seasons begin to change, I am happy to reflect on just how beautiful my garden has become. Having never had children of my own, I almost feel a sort of motherly, maternal instinct when watching my garden grow and evolve. I am very proud of how my garden has turned out and I can’t wait to watch it grow as the years go by.

There’s one thing we’ve been missing from the garden, and it’s a SECRET TUNNEL.

That’s right: a secret tunnel through the garden!

There might be some kind of building regulations that stop me from going underneath the neighbour’s gardens, but I should really look into it because I don’t just want a secret tunnel underneath my own garden. There’s no point in even having a secret tunnel at all if it goes nowhere. And if it turns out that I can’t dig a tunnel deep underneath the property belonging to the neighbours (not like they’re using the space…), then I’ll just have to pour all my effort into building some kind of secret lab instead. That’s where the secret tunnel will lead.

My interest has been piqued by all this talk of aggregate. Carrum Downs is having a tidy gardens competition, and everyone is rushing out to purchase crushed rock and all sort of landscaping supplies to improve their gardens. But the thing is…they’ll all end up looking the same. That’s a massive pain for the people who have to judge the competition, going from one garden to another with perfect pebble formations and little garden beds of sand and flowers. You know, whatever’s in.

You have to do something slightly out-there to really get their attention, and you know what’s totally out-there? That’s right…a secret tunnel. Even if I don’t win, I know I’ll be leaving a good impression on everyone who finds out about my ingenious idea. None of the judges will ever have seen a secret tunnel underneath a garden, possibly one that leads to a secret man cave.

Of course, the upper levels are quite important as well…got to make a good first impression, so I’ll have to follow the trends. Maybe I can buy sand in Cranbourne, make myself a nice little sandy flowerbed. Or however you use sand.

-Son