My Accommodation Must Have Mints

I’ve been looking at hotels for an hour, and none of them mention whether or not they have mints. Seriously, this is an international problem, because I’ve been looking at hotels all over the world and no one so far has mentioned it. That’s…unforgivable. The mint on the pillow is a basic service. It’s the thing that makes you feel like you’re somewhere else, as WELL as giving you a burst of minty freshness. Oh sure, there are a FEW things dotted around the hotel room that might give you the first thing. Nobody has a telephone in their bedroom any more, for example. But that unique combo can only be achieved with mints.

Guess I’ll just be taking my holiday is Lorne this year…again. We always go to the same cosy beach apartments in Lorne, ever since I was a child, and I know for a fact that the owner puts mints on everyone’s pillow. It’s like, 50% of the draw of the place, knowing that you’ll be receiving a minty fresh welcome. When do you get THAT at home? Never. That’s the answer to that question.

It’s not that I don’t like Lorne, but I’ve always wondered what it would be like to go somewhere else. I suppose there’s also merit in going somewhere familiar, though…because that way, you know exactly what you’re in for. ┬áIn your mind it becomes a place of relaxation and no stress. It is your special holiday place, where everyone knows your name. I’ve eaten at all the best restaurants in Lorne and the owners are always happy to cater for my family.

If I went off to Tokyo or something, I’d be stressing constantly about the language, and getting around, and getting lost, or committing some kind of foreign crime.

Too much stress. I’ll stick with the luxury Lorne accommodation, thanks very much.

-Tennyson

Change is Inevitable, Home Buying is Fun

I’ve been saying for years that this family is due for a change. People are so afraid of that little word…they hear things are changing and they curl up into a little, metaphorical ball and just refuse to negotiate. Well, now is a better time than ever!

I know, I know…the circumstances aren’t perfect, what with our family home being a burnt out shell. There are so many things that could be said, and are being said. ‘What were you thinking?’, for example. ‘You said it would be a nice surprise’ is another. ‘Fireworks are clearly marked for outdoor use ONLY’ seems to be a favourite of my wife and kids at the moment.

But it doesn’t matter how it happened; it happened, and we’re making the most of it! We can have a good old look around Melbourne. Buyers advocates are lots of fun; we can look for one of those too. Then we can add even more people to the fun adventure of us finding a home! Also, they specialise in finding the perfect home, which we’ll be needing since…I will admit…the way we lost our last one was slightly traumatic. We deserve a really nice house hunt and a happy ending, especially if it means we don’t have to live in this caravan any more. Not that living in a caravan is entirely a bad thing. I like to think it’s a grand adventure in and of itself. It’s like we’re travelling circus folk, hooray! Just like in those old Surreptitious Six books. So fun times lie ahead. We’ll find ourselves a quality Melbourne property advocate, have ourselves a good old home hunt and spend our nights looking up at the stars, toasting marshmallows on the fire that we built because the heating is broken. But that just makes it more adventurous. An open fire, just like the old days!

-Gareth