No One Expects the Secret Tunnel!!

There’s one thing we’ve been missing from the garden, and it’s a SECRET TUNNEL.

That’s right: a secret tunnel through the garden!

There might be some kind of building regulations that stop me from going underneath the neighbour’s gardens, but I should really look into it because I don’t just want a secret tunnel underneath my own garden. There’s no point in even having a secret tunnel at all if it goes nowhere. And if it turns out that I can’t dig a tunnel deep underneath the property belonging to the neighbours (not like they’re using the space…), then I’ll just have to pour all my effort into building some kind of secret lab instead. That’s where the secret tunnel will lead.

My interest has been piqued by all this talk of aggregate. Carrum Downs is having a tidy gardens competition, and everyone is rushing out to purchase crushed rock and all sort of landscaping supplies to improve their gardens. But the thing is…they’ll all end up looking the same. That’s a massive pain for the people who have to judge the competition, going from one garden to another with perfect pebble formations and little garden beds of sand and flowers. You know, whatever’s in.

You have to do something slightly out-there to really get their attention, and you know what’s totally out-there? That’s right…a secret tunnel. Even if I don’t win, I know I’ll be leaving a good impression on everyone who finds out about my ingenious idea. None of the judges will ever have seen a secret tunnel underneath a garden, possibly one that leads to a secret man cave.

Of course, the upper levels are quite important as well…got to make a good first impression, so I’ll have to follow the trends. Maybe I can buy sand in Cranbourne, make myself a nice little sandy flowerbed. Or however you use sand.

-Son

Growing a new life

I’ve lived in a beautiful farm house for the last ten years. I really enjoy waking up each day to sweeping views. Sitting out on my decking and eating dinner watching the livestock is quite stunning. I found out not too long ago that I was with child. I’m never nervous but also in a way excited by the prospect of carrying a child. The doctors tells me that I’m about 4 months into the journey. There is a slight problem through. You see my partner and my parents have never gotten along. My parents don’t agree with our union, my father has never gone into detail as to why that is the case. I have a feeling it’s about the garden, my family has dedicated professional gardeners who are experts in the field. My father is getting on in years, I don’t want him outside trying to dig up the yard at his age. My partner turned down his offer and my father has been grumpy with us since. I hope the news of a new baby will change his mood. At his age he shouldn’t be out in the hot sun planting canna lilies anymore. My partner has tried to mend bridges but it hasn’t gone well, at least my mother is a fan. I know for certain that in our new property I want professional garden landscaping.

A relative of mine suggested we have a walk around and see the other garden landscaping in our suburb to get ideas. I love the farm we live in now, there is plenty of space for a good garden. Our new home has to have a good garden. I spend a great deal of time outdoors. It would be nice to sit in my own garden enjoying a good book and a cup of tea amongst the fuchsias. I have several design ideas of my own on how garden should function. I’m confident that the garden landscapers will have suggestions on how best to utilise the space we have. It will be lovely watching the baby grow up as the garden expands. I honestly can not wait to be a mother.

A garden of delights

The atmosphere as you walk into the main dining lounge is absolutely electric. The hanging lights, textured walls and overhanging foliage create a parallel universe that surrounds and encompasses anyone who enters. I am often skeptical of highly atmospheric restaurants as it can often be a clever way of detracting from the average food. I was impressed but I was aware nothing had passed my lips yet. On the way to the table we passed through an amazing stone archway that looked like an old world relic that had been restored. The archway was covered with climbing roses, transforming it into a gateway to magical lands. Plants and flowers twisted their way through the cracks in the stone and beautiful colourful petals elegantly littered the facade.

I had just about recovered from the archway when my eyes were drawn to even more beautiful foliage on the back wall. It wasn’t really a wall at all, it was a living structure. Flowering shrubs acted as a border around what can only be described as a vertical garden. Spring and summer flowering perennials were popping out all over the place, it was divinely magical. We finally made it to the table after ogling all the decoration and the menu does not disappoint. It follows a slight mystical trend, lots of plant based foods and all the dishes are served with a corresponding flower arrangement that can also be eaten. It give me so many ideas for my garden at home. I was even taking notes on my phone throughout the evening and sneaking photos whenever nobody else was watching. The food turned out to be even better than their already exemplary reputation would have you believe.  I was so thoroughly impressed with the entire evening that I have devoted a whole different section to discussing the drinks, which are a fruity delight with a pinch of colour.